So you’re probably asking yourself, what are ‘Love Goggles?’ Well, to answer in the shortest terms, its basically a term describing when you’re in a constant goo-goo ga-ga– i’m obsessed with this guy I just met– I-wonder-if-my-first-name would-go-well-with-his-last-name state of mind. Which, in my twenty-two years of life, have found myself in wayyyy too much. I’ve found myself falling, hard, for
men boys that absolutely do not deserve it. Now, I know i’m not alone here. Raise your hand if the guy you’ve been crushing on for weeks finally asks you to hang out, and you find yourself planning what color your bridesmaids are wearing at your over-the-top wedding…
Yeah, that’s what I thought.
Love Goggles suck. They’re not necessarily a good thing to have, unless you have some god damn self control, in which, I do not. The common side affects are overwhelming anxiety, Instagram stalking, and shell-shocking embarrassment. I’ll give you a few examples. Once my freshmen year of college, I was super into this older guy ~a junior, go me~ that I hooked up with one Halloween (Now that’s a story for another day).
So, I found myself on the North side of campus, or in the dining hall, or the Rec Center a lot more than normal, and when I would finally spot him, my chest seemed to tighten up, I could feel my cheeks turn 50 shades of red, and immediately texted my group chat “OMG. I literally see (insert douche frat boys name here!)” All the while I would make myself just present enough in his view so we were able to have that one milli-second eye contact, half smirk smile/nod…
I mean, not to be dramatic or anything, but is the crippling anxiety and campus stalking that comes with that ‘touchdown’ moment worth it? It’s really not, but the Love Goggles made me do it.
Or how about when you meet a guy for the first time at a party or a bar, and you tooootally hit it off ..or…so you think. You get each other’s name and number, or some form of social media, make out a little bit, or you might even go home together, ending your night day dreaming about married life, coming home from a long day of work to watch Dear John together on the couch with a large Dominos while he pours you a (tall) glass of Skinny Girl Rosè. Sounds perfect, right? But the next day comes around and you don’t hear from him. You then find yourself checking your dry phone 10x more than normal, scrolling on Snapchat or Instagram to see if he posted anything about his killer Sunday Scaries (or the super fun, cute girl he met the night before?) all to never hear from him again.
You can’t tell me this doesn’t just happen to me, right girls?
It’s not our fault, I honestly blame the Love Goggles for the one-night depression and unnecessary resentment toward my boo that ain’t my boo, but should be my boo.
So I hope that answers your question. For those of you who simply cannot relate, stick around. You’ll eventually get a kick out of how comical my so-called love life is.
And for those of you who know exactly what I’m talkin’ about, feel free to share your stories with all us Love Goggle wearers, too.
👑 Love Goggles